It’s silly not to talk about the No. 1 issue, the No. 1 temptation, the No. 1 economic engine in culture for men—and that’s sex.
Testosterone never goes away; your sex life isn’t just a physical thing. God knows where your sex life really is—on the inside. There is so much sexual confusion, so much brokenness. I have never met a man who hasn’t, in some way, been impacted or broken in the area of sex in one form or another.
God’s mind on sex is very positive. Sex is a gift. That’s how He created you. Sex is a good thing. He wants you to use that aspect of your life for positive things, not to misuse or abuse it.
God hates sexual sin, not because He hates sex, but because He loves life. Our identity as God’s men, our energy and expression sexually is to honor, worship and glorify God.
But the message from culture is that sex is a compartmentalized, private aspect of your life that you really shouldn’t talk about a whole lot, and that it’s a deeply personal and individualized choice and experience. It’s almost a separated functionally in our physical and spiritual lives.
Unfortunately for all of us, culture is wrong, and you can’t separate sex and spirituality because God created it. It is not just another bodily function. It’s not just another pleasurable experience. It’s far more than that. To deny the spirituality of sex is disastrous in your life and the lives of those you’ve hooked up with.
Let’s take a look under the hood. We are going to look at the body. We will eventually go body, mind and spirit, but for this article, we are going to look at the physical aspects of sex and masculinity.
What is going on in your body? Men have testosterone. Our male physical development hits its peak at an early age. It has this bell curve we are all familiar with, but did you know that men have what we would call a man period—or a man’s cycle?
Women get blamed for their week of the month. It’s not a good time and they are suffering all the time. You know, she’s in a bad mood, with good biological reason.
After doing some research, I realized that men have a period too—or a man cycle—connected to their testosterone. I’m going to prove to you emphatically, from your own personal experience, that this is true.
Testosterone levels are highest when: morning or evening?
Testosterone is highest in the morning. That’s why you are going hunting in your shorts in the morning. When you wake up, that’s when there is blood flow. I don’t know why God did that, but for men it’s highest in the morning and lowest at bedtime.
Do you know that men also have emotional cycles related to their testosterone levels? It runs in a four- to six-week rhythm.
There are also periods of low testosterone levels, whether you’re older or younger. The lowest levels are generally in the spring, usually in April. The spring would be the male sexual winter. When we are in that season of four to six weeks, the key feelings that men have are apathy and indifference.
The peak time is November. I don’t know why that is, but maybe that’s why it’s football season.
Here’s where it’s actually more serious. Testosterone is very intimately linked to your level of stress, anxiety, depression, aggression and mood. This is very important because negative emotions have a negative impact on the people around you.
Is this a physiological thing? Is this fate? Can we control our hormones’ behavior?
Yes, testosterone has the ability to produce more stress, depression, aggression and anger in your life, but you have control over that. It’s all about who you are: your beliefs, your values and where are you going to go with those negative emotions and the impacts of testosterone in your life.
That’s where we’ll go in Part Two, because if there is a natural physiological presence of testosterone, and I’m single, I’m married, I’m more mature, my body is more mature or I’m single again, where do we go with it?
Kenny Luckis the president and founder of Every Man Ministries. As the former men’s pastor at Saddleback Church in California and current leadership pastor at Crossline Community Church, Kenny has found the proven way to improve men’s ministries around the world. Sleeping Giant is this blueprint, and gives men the tools they need to lead and understand their own men’s ministry. Watch Kenny’s teachings at everymanministries.com and start your men’s group today!
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